May 4th

Was feeling really down today. There are many reasons to it.
But, mainly is because of results especially amaths.
Yes. Your* guess is right. Laugh all you want.
I don't care.
I find it super disgraceful to cry infront of so many people. ):
But just couldn't hold back my tears.
Sorry if i made you guys worry for me.
Everyone's saying "Work hard. Practice."
But it's like sometimes, hard work and effort doesn't pay off.
& when it doesn't, you will like kinda get fad up .
Aiya , but since when is life fair ?
Someone people, just don't understand, how it feels .
I know everyone has their own problems and will fail in one or another way.
No one is forever winning. But, why is it always these few of us ?
I felt just like a "failure" no matter in what ways.
My parents aren't giving me stress. They just tell me to try my best.
That's part of the reason why i felt so so bad.
They don't accept much from me. They know my limit.
But yet, i can't achieve their expectation. How useless am i ?
I'm like not even fit to request them to buy me this, buy me that.
When, i can't even produce good results in return.

During PE had a great time playing basketball with the girls.
Laughters , screaming and shouting.
All disappear into thin air after recess.
Last period, had to take some !@#$ing photos . And i was like,
can i don't take with my swollen eyes ?
I bet i look just like a goldfish. Shit everything lahs !
By then, nothing was occupying my mind. I was just staring into air.
And i think, that's all i want to do at that point.
After school, together with ex-retards , we bought birthday cake for Vanessa.
She was super happy.
Though i wasn't in the mood to celebrate but still, didn't want to spoil the fun.


A big thankyou to ,
Quraishah , Raylene , Hadirah , PT , JiaLe , Suju , Cindy , Rachel ,
Thinzar , Vanessa , MinYee , Johan , Wee Kiat , Elson, Wee Tat & Mr Arman .
My sunshines of the day.
They believe in me. when i, lost faith in myself.
谢谢 x 100000
XiaoHeiZhu says i'm a good mother, I'm not a failure.
Really thankyou. Felt so much better after talking with you.

You* weren't there when i need you. ):):
I'm not okay. But, it's just for tonight. I'll cry, but only tonight.
That's the limit i set for myself.
我要做一个勇敢，坚强的女孩！